Pulse Home

When you fall asleep on the train you think of the streets rather than the train and the people and the faces and all the imagery outside leaking into your mind.

And then your sleep seems like lucid dreams of streets with girls in plastic heels walking around your head with cigarettes and american smiles.

Everything seems to smell of fish even if the sea is far.

I don’t have my glasses anymore as they hang from my hand and I end up smiling sitting on the sidewalk, getting a pint from the ladies.

And then fishes start walking around the streets like decorations and it’s merely if I walk down from my dreams.

I wake up to turn around and see sheep with lambs scattered and I wonder how much longer it’ll be until I get home from all the paintings around me a few hours ago.

-

I'm sorry for the delay and it's been quite hard lately with both of my relatives dying within days of each other and I really love them and still do, so I'm sorry if I daze off sometimes and I got really cheered up by an anon a few minutes ago who really made me smile and write, I don't think I'm as brilliant as Sylvia Plath though:D thank you

Thank you everyone really for liking my writing as much as you do

Thank you so much

I got my first request I'd say even at the hardest point of life not knowing what to do before I had moved and ever since writing and everyone keep me going along with the people I love and two of whom died this february.

Thank you

So much

I hope you enjoyed this

I just decided to walk down where I live and just wander around and all the streets and everything came in mind, didn't use all I saw will use later:)

<3

Sing To The Numb, To All Of Us

Threesome2

I think when we learn to fix a simple technology item from anything we should be able to turn on a human back again before the oxygen burns the metal.

And the television is broken and Kate is lying with her hair tied and make up just a bit smudged despite sex between both our bodies, I start to shiver and she gives me the cigarette licking my neck, her hand on my nipple and pulling.

She kisses my stomach down until she reaches my clit and I gasp a bit, her hand finding mine.

For a second Kate stops and the model looks up to glance at me, as I nudge my hips closer to her mouth and she closes her eyes her tongue out.

I stroke her hair out of place as her lips work on me, slowly, teasingly as I thrust against them wondering how red my skin would be in the end.

She strokes my legs before she goes up and we touch again.

We kiss briefly before our tongues rub and her fingers linger lower to stroke as I moan into her mouth, she bites my chin, taking the fingers out, myself gasping

her hips grind hard

She pulls my head against her shoulder, as my own fingers go to stroke her clit and I wonder the amount of men she had

and women

women

all the women who touched her

sex

she teases too much

“G-go down.” And I shove her mouth and the hair clip is out and she strokes my stomach as I come thrusting into her mouth.

I start shaking.

I keep hearing the doorbell, I feel myself young again and that Jamie would see me and Kate.

That we would be arguing.

“Make love to me.” She pulls the covers over us, stretches my legs out and her lips are on my own but I can’t stop shaking now, the veil of tension gone even if her orgasm trigers mine and our tongues rub frantically as she plays with my breasts.

Kate collapses again.

She looks at the ceiling.

I look at the ceiling.

Both lives seem long and far from end.

I touch her nipple and she turns around.

Kate sits up, taking my t-shirt and putting it on herself.

I go on the floor in front of her.

Too skinny.

I run my hands up to raise the shirt and I go down on a beautiful woman for the first time with her legs around my neck, her gasping and it feels just as beautiful and I keep peeking at her and I make her cum even if by the end my whole body is shaking and I can feel Jamie’s hand on the back of my body, going lower even if he’s not here.

-

I hope you enjoyed this chapter and feel free to request ahead. And my on and off relation with Kate Moss continues. I love her with Peter Doherty or even by herself but just not with Jamie Hince, dunno, it's just no, no and sometimes a maybe XD

Threesome3

Two inhaling old ladies

Two silver stars, one on the way out and one on the way back and I don’t step on either of them.

I’m wearing too much white as the whole sky which could be if you erased everything around and I keep getting it it all over a massive stab in the back of the body which just immerses itself into the blood and travels demanding a body or rather warmth which is gone over all the years and just sometimes only on death anniversaries the bones are reminded of living along with random people walking around in Nirvana hoodies.

I want to get married again to the dead.

The thoughts of suicide are too frequent and Kurt doesn’t visit, he isn’t supposed to with Francis out of touch from myself and even the magazines to spy on her like the rest of the world actually does.

The chain smoking and the loss of ashes just run itself out as if Kurt’s death was long gone now again

it’s a cigarette

you threw it away not caring at some point

to wash the cars bleach it out

with all the rain

and clouds

and all the weddings in head

Two old ladies walk by inhaling at the same time, we’ll never become those.

And I smoke by myself running into the star I mentioned.

All the men including a random walking bus driver look like Kurt

Inhale into the gone wedding

-

I had a long thought about this one, I saw a star on the street yesterday and one today closer to mines and decided to use them both, the ladies were seen by me in the town today, both actually inhaling at the same time and the bus driver was merely good looking and the idea of Courtney running into one who looked like Kurt seemed good at that time xD

I hope you enjoyed it and thank you and sorry for the delay

<3

new kill

Just give me a few hours back
and hold me there
in your sleepy arms

As the laundry twirls behind me as if they could all be my mechanic wings with all the swirls and if all the cloth around me could fall in my mouth so that I could chew it.

I take out the bear from beneath the counter for us both to see the night and wonder what happened to the three p.m. which had been so many hours ago with the man who walked in, a bit hesitating but with a sharp smile and felt a bit too cold even despite the weather and the clothing he wore.

He didn’t comment on my hair, all he did was walk in with bad clothing and smiled at me, gave me his clothing and looked around for a bit.

At first he said that he would wait then he didn’t and he just walked off.

Neither did he come to pick up the clothing or myself or my teddy bear.

The night just ended with the window showing the day with all the imagery outside to change and maybe some sandwiches to share.

-

I initially had chicken but then recalled that they were both vegans, so was stuck for an awful while thinking. The sandwiches don't have to have chicken in them >.>

Sorry about that and I hoped you enjoyed the new really short story I'll try to put up the Kurt and Courtney in a few hours:3

Thank you

<3

State Of Magic Play

What Difference Does It Make2

I smoked a cigarette with her or rather both one cigarette nearly in all silence and she didn’t even take off her coat, her nails against the mobile, a bright green, a bit chipped on the edges and I looked at the floor.

There would be no conversation and she left soon enough.

Paul didn’t call today.

I went to sleep after another cigarette and some salad I had done watching the television for a bit, a quick sip of water and off to bed in the same shirt.

I woke up and put on a tie staring at myself and seeing no meaning for today.

Paul didn’t call.

Alison did asking how were I and just ending the call shortly afterwards.

I dreamt of her holding ice agaisnt a bruised brow and kissing off the ice, holding it between her teeth.

I saw her in a bar the other day, maybe with Hince and I watched her for a bit without Paul and I drank a bit.

I don’t think she noticed me so I just wandered off really.

The next day she noticed me as we just walked on a street, a newspaper under her arm and she had her gold boots on. Most likely she oredered them again and her hair had been a newly dyed pink.

I try to sleep but I fail so I keep smoking until an unlit cigarette just falls out of my fingers and the next day Paul calls me wishing to record and I wonder if that is when not only does spring feel like winter but I get the bruised skin.

I end up talking to Alison.

About vegetarian food, saying that I like dairy and how she had forgotten the taste of milk over the years as she had done it nearly the same time Jamie didm herself still not trying fish.

I wondered if she was fading off Paul and if I were as he just strummed a bit and he headed off for a smoke.

“I’m not sure about Alison.” Paul says before throwing a fag in the bin and I follow him as he leaves out of the room and then I come back to smoke alone, eyes closed wondering a bit about home all of a sudden and the taste of milk and how would it be not to taste a strawberry yoghurt for quite a while for breakfast or in front of youtube or anything really and just relying on fruits which is what I do but with less and I wonder if I should pour the vegan some milk, she’s not with Jamie.

And for a bit I recalled that she had been nineteen, most likely something like a fifteen.

And I headed back in, wondering what would she do if I actually started strumming instead of talking to her.

-

I'm sorry about the delay and my best excuse would be being on holidays really xD sorry about that and my holidays are nearly over as sad as it is so yeah xD

I hope you enjoyed it and feel free to request further on and thank you

The story is turning somewhere I wasn't really planning it to but most likely my subconsciousness knows what the fuck it's doing xD which is how all my stories end up like anyway

<3

<3

What Difference Does It Make3

Red

Too many people die without anything.

Too many envelopes are discarded before reached or burnt in this case.

I run a hand through my hair looking at all the newly dead in the line, all holding a sealed envelope, new ones given just to feel a bit loved and with a mere nod they are given.

I quickly look through all of them.

I recall wearing a black robe to job once and my boss just slapped me across the face, saying to respect the dead.

I found it humorous, at least it seemed so and I recall how terrified the people were when I pulled up my hood, imagery is terrifying when you open your eyes to death and then you are in a post office and the price gets given.

You pay whatever you ahead left with a price on the back side of the envelope, then I lick it sealed and a person is headed off.

I wore a suit again and Paul just nodded it off as I smirked, making coffee, wondering what else could I wear to scare off the dead.

I take a few marshmallows I bought in the vending machine, while the dead waited in cue for the envelopes to be given.

Sometimes we have busy days and until you read what happened there is no connection to what is where they all come from.

Maybe me and Paul were once alive but I doubt so.

I just recall waking up on this floor and Paul telling me to stand up and telling me about my job and he gave me cake saying today was my birth and that the same thing happened to him.

We stay here, checking a little post box every day until we are sent away.

Paul started checking it for us lately and making sure none of the dead were here.

Paul was my boss ever since and he’s been here long.

I give him a few marshmallows as he fixes his glasses.

“What is sleep?” I ask him, handing him the pack and he takes a pink one, plays it between his fingers.

“Some state to ease your mind for those who die, sounds like a prelude really.” And Paul chews it and I smirk.

“Good.” And we finnish off the marshmallows together.

Sometimes it’s me and Paul left.

Others wander off into other sections of the building, leaving both of us in charge.

Paul turned off the lights once.

When we had no one and just stared at me, saying I have a nice jaw and I just looked at him as he started flickering with the light switch.

I took his face in my hands.

“Back where-” I kiss Paul. “Homosexuality is banned somewhere.”

And I kiss him again.

Paul gets an envelope the next morning after we kiss and I find it out as I drink my coffee.

-

I was falling asleep and the idea of prostitutes paying their price with Daniel at the desk came to me and it took me a while to even remember it as I woke XD I'm on holidays so sleep can be fucked XD

Basically I hope you enjoyed the story as much as I liked it and feel free to request a sequel, leaving everything open as usual

:O what happens to Paul? >:D I don't know yet either XD

Thank you!

<3

Red2

Used Lighter2

She waits for a bit.

She checks her wrist, licks it and glances at me.

My lips ache too much when I wake and she goes with her fingers threading my hair deeper into the store.

I moan but she goes deeper into the dresses and leather jackets and the tutus and all those old halloween costumes, she comes back with a lighter she found in a jacket which is now on the floor, lighting a cigarette from my left pocket.

Alison takes me into her lap as I can barely move, the pain spreading and she just smokes, looking upwards.

By the time I wake again I see the shop still closed, a few people scattered trying to understand the vampire girl strolling around with scissors in hand, cutting some fabric and stitching a lot of stuff together as the owner lies in pain.

I manage to raise my head in the next few days and she just slams it back in on the floor and I hiss, biting her fingers.

Then she takes my chin as it shakes and opens the door with all the people in fake frames and short pants.

We sit on the sidewalk as the store is opening with a DONATE BLOOD TO A NEW VAMPIRE with the name of the city misspelled by the vampire.

In the end some blond girl gives me her wrist and I start sucking as I wonder how does the society react to a second vampire and I shiver as Alison snatches the wrist away from me and all I feel in my mouth is salt really.

Alison asks me where I live as I manage to walk slowly and she takes my arm around her.

“I live nearer.” She doesn’t, it’s a block further from mine but she opens the big wooden door with pigeon killers above it with a few feathers scattered on the floor.

I hug her from behind, collapsing into the dark as she closes the door behind her and we are left to sleep in a place with no windows.

We wake up and I see peach yoghurt in from of me.

“It’s a treat.” She smiles weakly and goes a bed, the bed covers wrapping themselves around the girl, she then remembers and takes the clothing off, glancing at me and smiling, moving to a side.

“I don’t like the monument in front of your house.” Alison says with a light struggle, kissing the back of my neck as we take off my shirt and my chest appears to be slashed as she runs her nails over it. I simply assume that it might be some weird side effect.

“I didn’t put much venom in you, that’s the thing.” She explains the slashed chest and licks a wound as it stings and I take her hear, threading it just like she did and Alison licks lower.

She undoes a button, licking right above my cock and then she takes them both at the same time, taking it in her mouth and sucking until I thrust in her mouth and I come.

“Vampires don’t really have sex.” She says.

“Why is that?” I reply.

“Scattered.” She smirks and leans against the wall as I go down on her and she flips me over until she is sitting on me and I run my hands up her theighs, maybe returning the favor and she comes as well.

I keep sucking her, licking her for quite a while until she comes quite a few times until I’m fully erect again, but we don’t do anything about it, she just turns herself against a side, I couldn’t see the wall, just the dim lighted bed most likely by my own vision and I pulled her closer to me.

“I don’t like the monument in front of your house.” She mumbles again as she drifts off to sleep.

We wake up and we eat yoghurt again, maybe dairy is the new milk as we sit on the floor this time a pink, red and yellow rug which seems like it could’ve been in my store, maybe sneaked off as the other shop assistants complained how dusty it were.

I wonder of she ever went behind the clothing and slept there, using boots as a weird pillow, as she likes rougher beds and pillow but big soft covers and maybe my arms.

We smoke a cigarette and she doesn’t say anything, finishing the yoghurt.

Alison places a hand on my cheek and frowns a bit, before going back to bed, her back turned but the bed seems more narrow and I sleep on the floor. She tells me to go back to the bed eventually and I collapse looking at the ceiling which now has fake stars which glow and I ask her where do they come from and she says she bought them in London while I slept saying that my sleep is longer than hers that she can travel with my wallet open.

I don’t say anything instead I invite her to mines and she agrees, as we both see the bars on one of my windows and the monument with the scattered leaves.

Alison sits on it, lightening a cigarette, looking at the sun like the instructions say, light goes in her face as she becomes more pale and then she turns towards the shadows she must avoid and I hug her.

She doesn’t like the monument in front of my house and hisses as we go in my home, opens the window to take off the bars and destroys the thing in the morning as I have a dream in the night that she disappears in the light.

Alison starts the morning with a hammer and acid to get rid of the thing which haunts her, the monument and she takes a smoke on it’s place, fading lightly until I briefly kiss her ear, she hates the place anyway and we crawl back into her home, making it twice.

-

The monument is actually quite freaky, should find out more about it and after a stroll trying to get inspired I found what I thought could be their homes and I hope you enjoyed it and feel free to request a sequel and thank you.

<3

Used Lighter3