Wednesday, 20 April 2011

Seven and One

I am going to be seven and one
Such a biography
With an intense feel
If the hatred I imagine from outside
As if it were the bed covers
Which hold the fears
Which stick at my nose
The covers tight around my head
Holding what I imagine to fear
I wish I was 71 to blame
So honest
So sincere
When I can't stay still about my thoughts
As I think of the people who may read
And I panic
The fear
Of the awaiting ages
And the seventeen I had once imagined
With the dyed spiky hair
Instead of blonde in a few hours
Under The Doors
With When You're Strange in my head
With an alive Jim
The inspiration
From a person I do not know
the ages
When I feel for people who I had imagined
When I had clung thinking that it was fate
If only I got told what awaited
I want to know the future
To sleep calm
And watch myself unfold it
Without screaming
Onto the walls with pleasure
You just don't confess
Upon the 20th and between the 22nd
Because I'll be too busy
At something
Which I hold mutually
Deeper than music
Deeper than life
As the grains are eaten
As the grains are split
In laughter
In mouths
Borders erased
Screams hired
It's the twentieth
You know history
You've been tried to get it down your throats
But those who refused
Need to be shot
I am not the one to judge
I just sin
By the thoughts which are not
Until they go black
With a background which should be changed
I am seventeen
With the black and blonde
The banality of my soul to expose
Never to be twenty seven
Under the light
Of a magazine
In the flash
Of the notes
And letters
As the thoughts come
The end not clear
Only the facts and eternity


Today is the day before my birthday, favourite day of the year, actually, the age is different though, as I kept thinking and the poem came. I still write poems more than prose and my style changed from my deep abstract to something more complex and shelved at the same time.

I feel old.

About Script Frenzy I'm going according to plan, my script is called The Gray Fear about an asexual girl and one-sided platonical/physical love. I can talk about it for ages, but that shall be things to spoil.

So far Exit is winning, the voting will be used, so The Gray Fear might be the next after Exit if you wish so.

Thank you