Friday, 12 April 2013

What's wrong?

I don’t know how to make friends anymore.

In kindergarden seemed to be simple, yet I clung around one girl and that was really it. So, no, I don’t know how to make friends, my room was my friend with the posters and my own reflection where I would see how chubby I’d get.

I still wouldn’t get friends even now when I work at the toy store. When we close, I stay in it, eating salad and wishing the toys would come to life, avoid me and I would play with their hairs, dance while listening to Roxy Music for instance.

I was brushing the red hair of the doll and he walked past. I haven’t really been interested in men ever since I popped a bubble in my ex’s face. I had a few women and it didn’t matter men or woman. You’re attractive, you’re attractive, I’ll have you in hearts in my head.

“Alison?” I push the doll deeper to make them all fit. I wave back and head towards the car section, taking from a colleague, my necklace jingling with all the weird Barbie faces I have there.

People buy cars, ponies, everything I even see adults some times.

Daniel applied for the job, but he didn’t start in a few months but he would go to the doll section. He’d take two.

I just hoped he didn’t keep them boxed and redressed them for each season.

“One for me and one for my niece.” He found the need to say and I just shrugged, taking out a Lagoona doll from behind two Draculauras. “Wave two. Take it while you can.”

“Thank you.” And that’s all we had until I dyed my hair pink, watching the pink change colour to my towels and my entire bedsheets as I played with my insomnia.

I just redressed my dolls before going to work, putting too much hairspray making me look like I was a falling star, too much everywhere.

One of the few sentences me and Daniel exchanged was him saying “I’ve got a suicide note for every day of the week, so every time I look at my knife, I think what day is it, to bring myself back” and he smiled, making me think as we shared a cigarette, saving money.


I've been pretty down the past few days so yeah, sorry about the wait and thank you, I hope you enjoyed it and feel free to request:D I'm feeling better now, finally, I really am:)

I'll have my birthday in a week, odd XD

Thank you


Feel free to request:D

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