Loose Sincere

She opens the door and our gazes don’t even meet and I just take my hat off, scratching my neck as I enter in and I see all the animals all over and how she made sure that everything is cozy and she sits on the sofa, in the living room and she’s looking above at the small chandelier, something I’m sure she had gotten with her husband and she just smiles at me, still without looking at me

I know we’ve both aged and you only notice when you actually think of it

And when our gazes meet is when we both smile, as if there is something to smile about and that is how Meg shall forever hold herself, never to say anything, just to hold herself, not even speak, just watch me until I dissolve and she would be the one just watching, before asking something which she knew would make me talk. 

I wonder if any of us are unlit matches

Because sometimes I wonder if any of us are burnt out, but I know that neither of us are and her smile is still bright and curious and the flirting thought that I cross her mind still is subtle, but gives me some hope and she raises her eyes to look at my cropped hair

She’s seen it all

And it’s obvious and you’re not even naked in front of Meg, because there is no point.

And sometimes I don’t even know why I visit, sometimes she asks to leave a vinyl of what I’ve done and I do, excusing myself with haste as I make it to the car and she watches, arms crossed, hair in face as I bring it back to her and that’s my cue to leave. 

“How’s Scarlet? Henry?” She asks, as if a small cue for me to stay and I keep my hands in my pocket and we were never picturesque for either of us, it felt as if we were too well painted or too cracked but something would keep us going and it’s funny to say that if there were only one name upon a person’s lip or even an order of hierarchy she would be there, maybe because I’d stick myself with her, until my mind wouldn’t hold, but there would never be hesitation to ever leave her until it was said.

It was always her who would break it off, so if she were to initiate, it would always be her.

I watch her.

I told her last time about Karen and usually I show her photos from my wallet and I do this time as well, approaching with caution. And she watches, smiling and that’s all for now.

And I know I won’t reach her and I feel my lips tighten and she’s the one loosen, because I am the one who leaves, it’s in my script and in my ideology of fidelity, only she doesn’t know that she’ll always be in those boxes or rather in the lack of of them-

“but it doesn’t matter.” I say swaying my hand when I’m out of the driveway, she would think of it as a wave if she were there.

When you leave Meg, you think of all the things you wanted to say, but in the end it doesn’t matter because by next time there will be nothing to say anyway. 

-

I have too many stories frankly stashed away which I've started writing or stories which have like three chapters left to publish and I'm slowly torturing everyone with stretching because there's just so much to choose from xD I wrote this one quite a while, I felt this sudden urge to write a Jack/Meg because I always found it interesting how Jack would say that to talk to Meg you have to specifically go to her house and that's the only way she would communicate and in general, I think, I like everyone miss them as fuck. 

So the idea was solely around Jack visiting Meg and well, to be honest, I'll see where I will take it from there and how long it will end up being. 

It's also weird that I haven't written about them properly in… two years? And I know, I should update Before The Stripes, don't worry I know @.@ I've been picking up all my older stuff and binge writing or finishing those which were near the end. 

Title was me listening to "Alphabet Pony" by The Kills and just popped in my head and frankly because I wrote the title down, I decided to post this and yeah, anxious as always and I miss The White Stripes too much. 

I hope you enjoyed it and please tell me if you did, comments, tumblr, twitter, anywhere, you can reach me anywhere xD