Wednesday, 30 July 2014

I'm waiting to greet you

It’s a brief moment of loosening and her falling right through my fingers, as I watch her from the side of the stage and I no longer crave for cigarettes, nothing to numb out the noises which come from the stage, the mumbled and the laughter which I’ve no longer grown to see and I keep watching them and she’s told me what was going to happen and I don’t even look away, I keep staring, now hating the song for much longer than I ever have and they all stumble as if they are not aware, as if Jack is still in his his high school fantasy

and suddenly I’m the one who is old enough

and their lips meet for me to see and I feel my bottom lip ache from the bite and I just grab a guitar from the rack, my whole body shaking-

I don’t smash everything even if I feel destructive and I see someone ask me how am I and I don’t reply, just going to the bathroom and I feel my shoulders shake far more sooner than anything which comes out from my eyes and she’s the one whose always walked away and I keep flinging her in anger away and away, let my bones become nothing but material and I could see myself dissolving, all tears gone much before I’ve even expected them to even start and I just walk back onstage, joining 

and I could feel everyone surprised that I’m even on a stage with him, far too many things flung between us and I had broken up with him much before she even touched him, when she swore she would never date anyone who she admired, gesturing with her hands in front of my face

that to keep me clean she’d have to keep me away, something I still don’t understand and maybe they’re the ones who need this waltz, not me and depression is no longer my friend, but depression becomes me, I don’t think I’m even myself

when he approaches me and I just turn around, the music going in and out and I try to mute it out, with old memories, half a twirl and an old taste comes to the tongue, let it go-

it’s over, it’s all over and my fingers are all covered in blood of all the past relationships and kisses I’ve tried to build with her, my mind never wrapping around anything and my skin seeming to speak for itself, pulling my mouth to tell that I’m alright

Jack is in my changing room. He’s preferred her over me and it’s more than an old rusty love triangle. I pull my suit off

“I’m not with her.”

I don’t even ask why he kissed her as he raises his eyebrows and I think I’ve had enough Americans. 


I was actually thinking to stick this kiss moment into Settle A Quarrel, but the thing is, it's not very fitting and the story takes place before all of that, so yeah. I mean, I honestly thought that the kiss would resolve something but it didn't, they seem to be very on and off and yeah.

So I just decided to write a short story about it:3 yes, I'll continue Fucked at some point >.> I've been slowly picking up old stories, sorry about that! I wrote a bit of Poison The Rose today actually :D so yeah :3 and I've got a bunch of updates coming because so much is written, again Settle A Quarrel has a new chapter :3

I find it odd that Jamie came on stage and even avoided Jack, so I just thought that it was some loose treaty between all of them and dunno, the whole thing was really interesting. 

Me and Callie were joking that Jamie looked a bit nostalgic with so many people onstage xD yay Blyth Power Jamie xD 

Also, I'm sure Jack and Jamie were canon at some point, so yeah :)

I like weird titles, like who is greeting who here, Jack sprouted in mind so yeah:3 Taken from Lana's Bel Air which I was listening to just now:3

I hope you enjoyed it as much as I did :3



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