Deviant's 4

I wake up with a massive desire to go to the toilet but Carlos holds my wrist and pulls me down under all the fabric of the colours of the covers and it feels like a lawn with the rain heavily pouring down the cold morning and its cold shivers outside and I try to imagine that I can see all the people running around, opening their umbrellas like mushrooms and that phrase reminds me that I might’ve heard this before when I was a child and being gay was something surely you were not.

I light a cigarette to fill the room as Carlos puts his hand on my crotch and I loosen my eyes so that they fall halfway and my chest is exposed ready to be wounded by Carlos’ kisses and he laughs and wakes up.

Carlos is too busy with his sleep and the bar in order to buy anything or change apartments, he mentioned that he got offered something on the Royal Mile but declined as he threw his cigarette out and you can see the bar from the window anyway and he looks down as a rat runs past and he just pushes himself to the maximum out of the window and falls, his feet holding him tight to the ground of the floor and rain pours instantly down his skin as he breathes harder and begins to cough, so I throw a towel over him, shielding his breath and rain until it soaks and I smoke, rain drenching my addictions as I close the window behind us, but that’s how it feels, I leave Carlos under the towel with rain coming from his blue sponge and finally leave to pee.