I take off my socks and I still feel the heat before the cold actually hit my feet but that moment of bliss lasts as I put the kettle on and I take off my glasses to see the blur give me a sense of morning and the numb worry to be my blanket as my hands don’t shake yet I make toast and I hear faint music from the neighbors or maybe it is the back of my head.
I think about my son for a while not looking out the window and I make myself tea and I don’t burn myself like last time, the numb part of the life when you just stand without socks just stretches out and I sit on the floor now and then I lay down maybe to feel death for a bit and then to stand up and feel the eat actually being cold and I don’t decide to burn my food instead I order something without knowing and I wait on the floor.
There is no meaning to open the door or not.
I just pay and eat on the floor, laying, smiling to nothing, maybe death to see.
I stand up and drink the cold tea.
I think about my son for a while not looking out the window and I make myself tea and I don’t burn myself like last time, the numb part of the life when you just stand without socks just stretches out and I sit on the floor now and then I lay down maybe to feel death for a bit and then to stand up and feel the eat actually being cold and I don’t decide to burn my food instead I order something without knowing and I wait on the floor.
There is no meaning to open the door or not.
I just pay and eat on the floor, laying, smiling to nothing, maybe death to see.
I stand up and drink the cold tea.
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