Sunday 13 October 2013

Gandalf's Inhaler 3

I keep thinking that he’ll say ‘let’s go find Ezra, he’ll be laughing his ass off’, but he doesn’t, instead we just dance and get another flask from Breana. I wonder why the fuck he doesn’t have his own and he tells me he has drank his.

We still end up dancing and I can’t help but grin back at him, wondering -

too many things, which escape my mind, but I don’t think them consciously, I just hear an echo in the subconsciousness.

When I come back, Matt is already sleeping, he left sooner to shag Breana and I try to ignore the discarded condom on the floor and I kick it under Matt’s bed, realizing that well, technically I’ve touched them and I fall on the bed, recalling our kissing and how he had kissed me again after realizing who the fuck I was and who I wasn’t.

I can still see him and I wonder if I should go use the bathroom, but before I shake Matt to wake the damn fucker up.

It takes a while, but once he sees me with the flushed face and the flushed lips, he just grins, giving me a thumbs up, before rolling over again.

“Matt.” No reaction. “I made out with Alex.”

And then it takes a moment to register, he asks me who the hell is that and I say Mr. Turner, my biology teacher and of course that springs interest in him and he sits up, mouth open and wondering what the hell should he say, but before he asks me anything, I’ve got one question which has been lingering in my mind.

“Who the fuck is Ezra? He had mentioned some Ezra, who was s’posed to be dressed as Gandalf as well.” Maybe no one besides Alex was aware that he was dressed as Gandalf, I mean, he was going to make a move on him after all, I mean, you just don’t want people to know who you are going to snog around.

“Um... that’s my economics teacher, really. He’s not too great, but I s’pose he’s alright, why?” Matt asks and I just shrug, wondering for a while if I should spread old rumors, but just coz he made out with me, doesn’t really mean anything, he could still be going for Ezra and end up with Ezra.

I mean, he is a teacher and well, we’ve all had our crushes on teachers and I guess Alex would be my own, only the difference would be that our lips had actually touched and our hands hadn’t wandered too much.

“No, man, you tell me what the fuck happened.” Matt says and stands up, going towards the table and opening a can of coke. Booze is limited and we’ve drank all we’ve managed to gather in the past week for the wee dance.

“He thought I was Ezra, coz he was s’posed to meet him or whatever, so I was Gandalf as well-” I don’t know how to explain and what should I leave out, so I pretty much want to tell everything, even when drunk, Matt has never spilled anything, maybe coz I know him too well to tell something in return or maybe coz we’ve been friends for so long.

“Is it like a gay thing to dress up an McKellan?” Matt interrupts me.

“Fuck off, I had no idea.”

“But you did dress up as him coz you wanted something gay.”

“So? Fuck off.” I’m starting to get pissed and anxious that I had stolen a kiss, I’m sure he had just kissed me again, coz we were making out and yeah, the moment was there with the dimmed lights, the shite pop music with closeted artists. “Maybe Ezra and the other two or three Gandalfs had the same thought, how the fuck should I know?”

I know he’s trying to distract me, but I’ve got Alex in my head.

“Does he live here as well?” I blurb out and I want to see him, bang on his door and ask him too many things, I don’t understand how I had let him go. I felt embarrassed and once the music stopped we just waved at each other and departed.

“I know Arielle does. Well, at least I’ve heard she invited some students for some girl night in or whatever and then they had wondered if it’s ok, but then, it’s not like they will have an orgy, I mean, that’s what they thought. I’d enjoy a girl orgy.” Just as women get disgusted by men getting turned on by girl orgies, so do I, when women say how they’d film the shit out of a gay orgy, it’s kind of stay in your own sandbox. You’re straight, grand, watch your straight shit, but I’m too tired to talk to Matt about this, I’ve got my teacher in my head. I’ll be eighteen soon and I have no idea what his age is. I barely know him besides the shape of his lips and the taste of his mouth.

The Arielle rumors circulate again and they disgust me. It’s not that I despite women, I just despite plain shelled ones and from what I’ve heard she is. Matt has her as a teacher and he said it’s the worst class ever, she seems to have something which screams ‘like me’, but I don’t.

The rumors circulate and I think of Alex and Ezra, maybe Arielle is Ezra in a wig, but then Matt has both of them as teachers, so they shouldn’t be the same person.

I actually end up exiting the room, no longer dressed as Gandalf and I wonder if it’s a bad idea, but I think everyone is pissed drunk anyway. Matt didn’t say anything, instead the turned off the fire detector and started smoking, wondering what the fuck would I be doing.

I wonder that myself, I could just wait until the next lesson, but my whole body is on fire and the desire is now turned on. I have too many images of him in his lab coat, telling us what event is up after the lesson and how his lips move.

He should be in any of the buildings.

I’m thankful for it being friday, because on fridays some are tipsy and today frankly everyone is drunk. I head outside and I notice how traceable the stars are. It feels awkward and I don’t feel lonely anymore, I have his lips in my mind and I know I’m going crazy.

I feel as if the stars are broken glass and are falling around me for luck, as I check one campus and I check which teachers live in, walk past some end of a party as another building has people playing hide and seek while tripping while drunk. I watch a person hide behind the one who is counting and I leave.

I get the lucky end of the dip and I head in, a few people scattered and I wait for them to leave before I start knocking really loudly on Turner’s door. Maybe I’m wrong, I mean, I know shite and he knows shite.

I’m really trying to convince myself that I’m not shite, which is awful.

I get scared what if he had scored a shag with Ezra.

But in the end he opens the door, all sweaty, his hair clinging to his face still and he grins, just from someone knocking on his door before he sees that it’s me. I just gulp and he looks around, before pulling me in by the shoulder.

I think he’s drunk and he peeks out again, before locking the door. I wonder what the fuck is he counting before Alex turns around. I wonder about his age briefly before he grabs me and kisses me again.

I freeze up and I can’t do anything as his tongue opens my mouth and we start frenching.

What if I hadn’t appeared?

I can’t be mistaken for Ezra again, right?

But I don’t care and I slam him against the nearest wall, he surely tastes like every single thing that could’ve been in a flask today.

I get anxious.

Is this something we should be doing?

I don’t have anyone to ask this question and when his mouth goes on my neck, I feel even more anxious, wondering if I should push him off.

His hand starts unbuttoning my cardigan (I really didn’t want to go in my Gandalf outfit, McKellan has enough shags already, being so open and so... gay).

What if I’ll get bored, because... all is happening.

I cup his face, he’s taller than me, but not by much and I start kissing him again, Alex’s hands already under my shirt, which make my heart swell and I don’t think I can function anymore as his finger tips stroke my spine lower and he starts undoing my pants.

I wonder how much he had drank and how the fuck he’s a teacher

But maybe-

All I’ve heard is about Ezra from his own mouth,

is he even attracted to me.

His lips are too hungry so I can’t even speak, as he takes-

He fucking took his own shirt off and well, frankly I don’t care

I undo his pants and he undoes mine. Both of our erections against each other.

I feel anxious, but I’m still here, I’m in the scene, taking his shirt off, it’s not about a question how the fuck do I do it.

He is leading, I fucking-

I mute the voice in my head.

Alex had cared.

I don’t know if we should speak.

I put my hand in his boxers, as he leans his head back.

“Miles.”

I bite his neck harder, ok, he knows who the fuck I am.

Turner drags me towards his bedroom, taking his underwear off, pushing me onto the bed and all I hear is my own insane heartbeat as he pulls my own underwear down, taking me in his mouth and I gasp loudly, pulling his hair as he starts sucking,

I think I’ll collapse, I think I’ll fall down under as he starts licking the tip of my cock

Fuck, what if he had shagged Ezra too-

Fuck Ezra

Fuck

Yeah, fuck him

And I get too near and I arch my back before he takes me out of his mouth and I actually moan in despair, closing my eyes, breathing heavily

“Do you have a preference?” And he sucks on my neck slightly before looking at me with dark eyes.

I think I shake my head too enthusiastically which causes him to start laughing as he is sitting on me and I realize how young he looks, maybe he is straight out of university.

I sit up and I start kissing him, before he pulls me on one side, opening a drawer with lube in it.

“I knew you were coming.” He grins.

“Fuck you.” I pull his lip with my teeth.

“Exactly, fuck me.” And Alex starts biting my shoulder as he hands me the lube.

Fuck.

It’s the same.

He keeps nibbling on my shoulder as I take out some lube on my fingers, I don’t know how I’m still alive with this gorgeous man on my lap

I just don’t know

I know what I’m alive for

But I don’t know why I’m alive

And I pin him to the bed, as I start getting nervous

But I’m too turned on to care and his spread out legs make me too fuzzy, I can’t even think of words

It’s just him and his body

And I press our lips together, our teeth colliding but I don’t care as I slide inside him

I can’t help but gasp, feeling over the edge already and Alex digs his nails into my hips as I start thrusting deeper, lowering myself to kiss him as he licks my lips before pulling my lips and we start frenching, both moaning with each thrust.

We both collapse, coming and I can’t feel anything anymore, my heart muting out everything and all I can feel is Alex’s kisses on my hair. I can feel him trail his fingers on my back, as we both still breathe heavily. I don’t know if I should tell him that I’m-

Ok, I’m not a virgin anymore.

Nothing happened before besides kissing and here, well, I scored a fucking shag

But scored sounds like an awful word to use when I open my eyes and see him looking at me like a puppy, exhausted with-

I’ve got too many sappy words in my head and I kiss him softly, pulling him into a hug, stroking his own hair. He looks like a happy puppy and he-

“Alex.” I don’t know why I said his name, between breaths now as I kiss him again and anxiety tries to creep onto me, but-

I’ve got him

At least for now

I know I’m his

and for now

I really hope he’s mine.

When he curls up against me and I kiss the top of his head, with no words exchange besides “night” which in the morning makes me realize how dumb that was.

-

Pretty much I've been obsessed with writing this and yes, I'm still writing chapter four but I'm pretty fast so yeah XD

There's not a lot of backstory, I think, pretty much I was thinking to leave it with Miles having a wank when he comes back, but then Miles really decided to go search on Alex.

Ezra being an economics teacher was pretty much of a joke between me and my partner after we saw the whole Ezra "owning" a bookstore tweet and I had asked what kind of teacher would Ezra be.

So what was really going to happen was more tension between them and Alex apologizing again, but hey, Miles went in for it, so yeah. But I pretty much suck at keeping tension and in life as well, so I guess that's where it's coming from XD

I'm getting pretty shy from all the attention, so I'll head off and write the next chapter XD

Oh and I know everyone has a different level of comfort, but I've well, at least in the past few years I never really felt shy not to write a sex scene, I mean, it's sex, it happens between couples and frankly it really depends if you're comfortable with writing them, really. But I still think we need more good sex scenes in fiction and fanfiction, sex everywhere xD

So, I'm off to finnish off chapter four :D

Feel free to request if you want the next chapter posted :3

<3

Gandalf's Inhaler 4

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