Friday 4 October 2013

What's Wrong? 2


“How do you forget about your broken heart?

When do you fall out of love?” Was the first thing Daniel had asked me after we agreed to share a cigarette to save money up.

The decision to save up money was after I decided to spend some coins and call my parents from a phone booth, because just like when you go to the swings at dark to watch the stars, I wanted to go inside to see the prostitutes which are no longer working due to age glued on from the 00s. I called them and they told me that the money I was earning might not be enough.

It payed.

Sure, I wouldn’t go around eating out and my place wasn’t too nice, but I could live.

But I got to be around toys and I had my shelf of dolls and I could buy all the clothing lines I wanted for them.

I had just looked at Daniel, shrugging, passing him the cigarette.

“I honestly don’t know, I mean, sometimes you don’t even recall your exes until you stop at some corner where someone had asked you about them and then they crash upon you. I honestly don’t know.” I keep repeating myself, as we end the cigarette but we remain outside, too early for the kids to walk in, but we head back.

I open a few boxes, knowing what to put on display and we start redressing the Monster High dolls into the fashion outfits, brushing their hair, Daniel complaining about the glue.

Sometimes I just freeze when I see someone who resembles him and after we had broken up and he was on posters made it worse. I play with a strand of my hair, the other hand holding the doll and I admire the detail of the face.

“Just tell yourself that he was awful. I really don’t know, Daniel.” I just sigh.

“Maybe, you’re right.” He had recently broken up with his boyfriend and it had been weird to find out that both of us were pansexual and depressed, because we get shoved into our faces that sexual deviants and people with depression are rare. Maybe that’s why we talk to each other after we had started reading the annotations of our new medication which will most likely screw us up, again.

My last one made me gain weight which caused an uproar in my family, but due to life crashing I got a softer one and I really don’t know if it will work.

“Just make sure you’re not around him, when you’re drunk. Once I was and when I’m drunk I want to dance and I had grabbed him in a twirl, it had been his birthday and I had been invited. And we danced. We never kissed, but laughs were shared and him holding my wrist, telling me to stop, as if it was a metaphor for our relationship.

I had to leave, into the night.” And I think of how I looked back then in the phone booth with people walking outside with iPhones and queueing for the bus, old ladies screaming at the foreign students.

-

Ever since I've written the first chapter, I've been thinking about this story and how I enjoyed the couple and the idea. I guess I also like it because I touch softly depression on it and medicine.

There's a bunch to tell, so I'll try paragraph by paragraph or so xD

I had a concrete toy store which I chose to write about, but as you know, well, shit happened and I'm no longer near it. And I wanted them to have a big showcase and window, so I figured that I might just create it in my head and keep it.

Now, why Monster High? Because I love Monster High XD and it's literally giving my characters something I myself am obsessed with, I haven't been properly taken track of the new releases due to shit happening, but I'm still a fan and I love them :3

Kind of ever since hell broke loose, I've been traveling and moving everywhere so I've had a bunch of memories jump straight at me and I've recalled a lot of things. I hold no emotions really, just like recalling how everything had been and I can't really say nostalgic coz my relationships were fucked up xD and I recalled today after drinking a few units, when I had drank and how I became a bit clingy and I pretty much stuck more feelings than I ever actually had and the scene with Alison appeared.

I think there will be more mentions of both of their exes, as well, is supposed to be, I mean we all discuss our exes in the early stages of the relationships, so yeah.

The phone booth was me just having an image of Alison talking in a phone booth earlier and the stars and swings is something I do, so there xD

Also when I had first arrived to Edinburgh I wasn't aware of the strict queueing as I was used to everyone jumping over everyone, so I had used that as well.

I hope you enjoyed it and please do request:3

Thank you

<3

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