Stale Smoke In A Running Circle9

And his hands are still on me and we’re both breathing heavily, it feels as if we’ve done what we’ve wanted for months and it’s gone, it’s like a horrible pain when you’re aware of the tooth and now it’s gone. I just keep clutching him and I press my lips against his and I feel the confusion bathing us. 

We both fix our clothes. 

I don’t know.

He rubs my tears with his sleeve and we end up sitting on the pavement, neither of us having cigarettes and we glance at each other.

“I’ll buy some cigarettes.” Was what Jamie says, looking down and actually picking the pavement with his fingers and I see how hard he is doing it and I wonder if he’ll rip his own fingers open.

“Great idea, Jamie.” I say and I don’t wait for him to leave, I leave myself, heading back to the apartment, poking slightly inside to catch Thom and Alex in the kitchen, managing to actually start cooking something. I wonder about both of their ages. I stay with just my head peeking in and I know they’re not looking, so I actually walk in.

“So... what would your sexuality be then, since this morning was with a bunch of discoveries.” Thom just chuckled and I watched him start slicing some cheese and I don’t even recall getting it. Maybe they had gone to Tesco as well. Alex fidgets a bit and scratches the back of his hand. In the end, he shrugs, most likely realizing that the biggest coming out today was Jamie’s anyway. 

“I’m queer pretty much. I mean, there’s no point to limit yourself. I never got the whole commotion anyway. Like you’re gay.” He stops for a bit, anxious and he slides down onto the floor. “Like what if you find some girl? Same for straights. Like, I never really got it. I mean, it’s just genitals and well, does gender even exist? Fuck, I don’t know.”

I see that he’s getting too anxious and he glances at me. For a second I can see him soften up and his shoulders ease up and I ease myself, feeling myself a bit uncomfortable, as if I had caught him staring at me exposed. 

I just walk in and I watch Thom do some bizarre omelette with a bunch of stuff in it, which looks like he’s raided all of Tesco and I wonder for how much we’ve been gone. I wonder how much had been discussed and how much had been seriously considered. 

I’m not sure if I feel uncomfortable and I wonder if I am glowing, after all you do fucking glow after an orgasm, even if-

Was it enjoyable?

I guess it’s nice knowing that I am liked. I don’t know. 

“So you’re queer, Al-” I don’t get to finnish my question, as the blonde man peeps in, smirking and finding himself awfully funny. 

“I’m gay.” Thom smirks and I see that the omelette is nearly done, but Thom puts the lid over it, most likely preserving it for Jamie, his morning’s lover. 

“We know.” Both me and Alex say and I just wonder, before I sit next to him on the floor and he seems thankful for any kind of affection. Thom hands each of us a quarter of a sliced apple, as he seems amused with himself, as he starts walking around the room, checking out all the books and the DVDs and the cutouts which are stapled to the wall (we did it while drunk and finding an old stapler which we simply couldn’t give to waste). He starts slicing another apple and I feel younger, well, I am younger than Thom and Alex is the youngest one. 

I wonder if he’d miss me and I feel guilty for showing interest, maybe it’s because I am aware of too many things. 

Well, if he’s queer, that changes things. I’ve had too many thoughts and maybe it’s time I’ve let them settle in my head, give them growth and wonder who I want to see in the mirror. 

-

I know, this has been posted way before the other requests in the queue. Sorry, my attention has been shamelessly shifted to Gandalf's Inhaler, I'll be honest and I am taking my time with the requests. 

Other requests are not dropped and due to the amount of people asking me about SSIARC I've decided to post it because I had this chapter ready. 

I am really surprised and happy this is getting so much attention with Alison being confused about her gender, making discoveries and it was a sudden change. I'm sorry, I am actually surprised and very happy that it had managed to catch so much attention and love, I'm guessing XD

Since I'm kind of having a wee break off requests and writing whatever Alex Turner story I feel like today, SSIARC is surely one of my favourites and I believe it will get given the same attention Gandalf's Inhaler has once GI is finished. 

Please keep checking and I'm sorry about everyone who had requested something else, they will be up, it might take a while, but I have said so before and thank you for your patience and love!

Now, about this chapter. Alex's coming out was in my head and way before I got a request to write this chapter I knew that Alison would peek and overhear Alex coming out, which is also a sudden turn.

And I suck at keeping tension and Alex and Alison in this story are one of the favourite couples I've written, so it's hard keeping the tension, but hey, I made it to nine chapters and they haven't kissed or anything, so it's like a record for me, haha XD

<3