Japan

I open a new chewing gum and I look at the other girls around me in the hotel lobby and I keep chewing, sometimes shifting closer to the door as they all exchange cigarettes and lighters with different things either carved into them or drawn and I take a drag from one which my friend has, pulling my hair back, my hands trembling.

You’ll get Richey, I’ll try Nicky

My friend kept saying over and over in the concert as we both managed to get near the stage.

Time.

I walk inside the hotel.

I’ve got a room.

I book in, my friend choosing to be outside and I take my hat off, holding it in my hands as I start going up as I see the bus pull up with all the manics get out and I turn around to stay in the lobby, holding the given key and I start blowing up bubbles and they all pop before they even get a glimpse of the life around before I’ll lose my virginity.

Just the thought of it makes me sweat.

On the last tour a girl I knew lost her virginty to Richey as well, she said it had been bliss and she came out with a cold, but her mission was long achieved.

I kept chewing until they all came inside and after a few minutes I stood up and pulled Richey’s sleeve.

“Hi.” And he smiles.

We all know what backstage is, backstage and the fuck area is spread out, Richey nods and we go upstairs and I offer him gum.

He doesn’t say much and once we enter his room I see some bottle laying around and he takes off his shift, vodka now being his drink as half of it goes onto his neck and his body as he undoes his belt and I see his cock and erection.

“I come from Osaka.” I say, trying to strike a conversation before we elope but instead he starts undoing my dress, harshly takes my breasts and squeezes them, vodka being his sweat.

“Cool” is the only thing he says and he takes my underwear down.

He bends me over and pushes my head against the mattress as we’re on the floor and he thrusts inside me and I scream.

I feel a pain through out my entire self piercing.

“NO!” I scream and he pulls out, lighting a cigarette.

My vision is too blurry and I look at his cock, how it’s lubricated with both of us and I keep gasping.

“What?” He blows a few smoke rings, laughing.

“I-I’m sorry. I don’t.” And I try to gather something, but instead he pushes me on the floor.

Richey thrusts inside me again, moaning, commenting on my virginity and my body briefly, stroking me to ease but I don’t.

“You knew what you came in for, give it.” And he keeps thrusting inside me, spreading out my legs to his liking and I don’t do anything, I just stare at his face, how he looks before the orgasm and how he feels inside and he pulls out as he comes.

Then he lights a cigarette and I look at the fact that

Was I raped?

I look at my shaking self and a bit of blood on my thighs and I look at my customer and he opens the window.

In the end no one really knows what to say to you.